Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Happy birthday Captain.


In honor of Captain James Tiberius Kirk aka William Shatner's 80th birthday, I present the Top 10 reasons why Kirk is better than Picard.

10. No matter what world Picard goes to, Kirk was there first and probably has an illegitimate child somewhere on the planet.

9. The only Klingon serving on Kirk’s bridge would be a dead one.

8. Kirk does not play the flute.

7. When Picard fought the Borg he got assimilated. When Kirk fought the Borg he blew up their home planet.

6. Kirk collects antique guns. Picard collects antique nesting dolls.

5. Picard’s name is known and respected throughout Klingon space. Kirk’s name is cursed and vilified.

4. Kirk can beat a Vulcan at chess.

3. Kirk’s youth was spent doing back breaking work on a farm in Iowa. Picard’s youth was spent squishing grapes with his toes in France.

2. Kirk faced off against Wyatt Earp at the O.K. Corral and won.

And the number one reason why Kirk is better than Picard…

1. Picard is from France.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Kill "Plan B."


As part of the creative department at KG Partners, I’ve been charged with “doing great work.” I couldn’t be more impressed. Nothing could be more vital. I think an important step in doing great work is killing “Plan B.”

I hate “Plan B.” I wish it would die like it was in a Tarantino movie.

It’s the safe plan. The fallback plan.

In advertising, “Plan B” comes about when someone gets scared and wonders if it wouldn’t be a good idea to give the client what they are expecting – just to have it in their back pocket in case “Plan A” doesn’t go over well.

The problem with that is, why fight to make “Plan A” work if you’ve always got “Plan B” to fall back on?

In the past, I’ve watched as “Plan B” destroys morale, kills brands and eventually forces good agencies to board up their windows. Why? Because “Plan B” is based in fear rather than doing what’s right.

“Plan A” is the good stuff. It’s built on a strategy that has found an insight. An observation. It’s tied to an emotion. It crackles with a creative spark. It’s crafted with care. It speaks to people, not at them. It finds a place in the collective consciousness and stays there – long after the print has faded, or the last of its 30 seconds have run out. It becomes a part of us.

“Plan B” is the opposite. It’s completely sterile. It’s assembled not born - like Frankenstein’s monster. Someone grabs a bigger logo and sticks it over there. Then someone stitches on product attributes – the bigger the better. Then they graft on the copy – most likely from a client-supplied internal memo. Then with a flip of the switch, “It’s alive!”

But, just like the monster, the thing has no soul.

The Karloffian monster shuffles off to the client meeting – lurching, grasping and begging to be loved. And of course, since the “Plan B” monster is created from doing exactly what the client would have done if they had Photoshop, they love it.

But, the horror story doesn’t end there. On a dark and stormy night, someone looks at the shelves and not one unit is sold. The client blames the agency for the abomination they created. And the agency has no one to blame but themselves.

So, I say we grab the pitchforks and torches and chase “Plan B” into the abandoned windmill and burn it to the ground. Fight for “Plan A. Refuse to participate in “Plan B.” Educate the client to recognize the wonder and greatness of “A” and the grotesque, shallow, pale-skinned horror that is “B.”

Or, we could coddle “Plan B.” Blow it kisses and promise to use it at a later date.

See, “Plan Bs” suck. Let’s go with the windmill thing.