
I'm kinda at the end of my rope. I'm broke. And when I say broke I'm not talking about woman broke. You know, where women say they don't have money, but the actually have about $900 in the bank and a couple of twenties in their purse. Nope, I'm broke. I honestly can say I have less then a five in my bank and a few coins in my pocket. Oh, did I mention the bills are due? The reason for this financial distress is that I'm out of work and have been since Sept. 11th. Why am I out of work? Because I left. Why did I leave my place of employment of 3 years? Because I trusted a "feeling". I woke up one morning and thought that perhaps I could do better for my family. That perhaps I could move home and be of assistance to my mother and sister (who was in the middle of a custody situation between her husband over my niece). However, I've been here now for 4 months and nothing...the money I had saved is gone and Christmas is coming. It got me to wondering, why did I listen to that voice in my heart? I keep listening for guidance and the voice that said "move" has now gone silent. Maybe my frustration is so loud that I can't hear it. That or the arguments with my wife are so loud I can't hear it. I'm beat up by this whole thing. I'm trying to keep the faith and listen for that voice. I'm hoping for a Christmas miracle... but I keep thinking of that Charlie Brown Christmas special when Linus turns to Charlie and says, "Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Brownie-ist." That's me right now. 3 months ago the football was there for me to kick, but today I ran up and someone pulled it away...good grief.
Surely if your intentions are good, and I mean they are really good, then you will be rewarded. I know you have probably thought of all this before, but maybe it helps to hear it from someone else. Your reward may not be in a form that you were expecting or one that you recognize at first, but it will come.
ReplyDeletePraying for peace and for the Lord to meet you in this place...
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